Writers block is a real thing - I haven't felt like writing for a week now.
I started four different blog posts and scraped each one because they just felt forced. I'm going to try again today.
I suffer from far fewer creative blocks and I rarely procrastinate these days. It's as if I've realised I'm running out of time and there's much to do.
Whenever I'm at my laziest I do the thing I love most, for no reason at all and it jump-starts me into action. So this morning I hopped onto Vogue and immersed myself in the outfits worn at the Met Gala.
I've worked out tricks like this to trigger the right frame of mind.
I wanted to start this blog by telling you about Bank Holiday Monday. Ranj and I went up to the Shropshire Hills and I have never seen such beauty in England before.
I wore gym gear because I wanted to do the advanced hike and thought that would be appropriate. The weather was idealic, the company handsome and still something was nagging at me - it was my outfit!
I always wondered whether fashion was a 'nice to have' hobby. I have spent many-a-hours talking to my bff, about whether I secretly just wanted a family and to live happily ever after.
It sounds silly but I was so relieved on the hike when everything was perfect but still not quite right. I wanted to take these epic pictures but my too tight lycra leggings and bobble filled vest were ugly.
I realised that I couldn't trade everything in for my love of great clothes. Clothes help me feel like I belong, they're my dialogue with the world.
I've been in a sweatshirt and leggings for far too long. When I moved to Birmingham all I wanted was to build this life with Ranj where we lived harmoniously.
Now that we're settled in, I realise how far from myself I've swam. I'm not sure weather I was trying to please him by doing the little things that meant I lost time in my day. I can't even pin point what those things are to completely stop doing them. I imagine it's silly things, like making sure the dishes are away for when he comes home after work. He doesn't even notice they're neatly in the cupboard and I miss out on doing something for myself.
Being autonomous in a relationship isn't practical but we should have lines. Ultimately if I seek out my own happiness, I'll be a happier person to spend time with and that will make him happier.
I'm going to stop there as I've gone off topic and I was supposed to talk about my favourite white t-shirt. So here it is...
This t-shirt, £45 was designed by Justin Beibers Stylist, Karla Welch and it's not for sale yet on Matches but I've added it to my wishlist. It took me three hours to find this tee - there is an art to it I promise. You want a certain white crispness, it shouldn't be too transparent unless you live somewhere sunny and don't need a bra then that's tres-chic. If however, you live somewhere with grey skies and can't do without a bra, you want a t-shirt made from 100% pure cotton. It should be weighty when you hold it up but not stiff as it should fit freely. The sleeves should be loose at the ends and hinge just off the shoulders. You want a t-shirt that sits neatly on the waistline, no higher to avoid it turning into a crop top or any lower because you'll need to tuck it in and that adds weight to your waistline. Look for a neckline that's circular and as close to the nape of your neck without it strangling you. Keep it as plain as possible, this is one time where being a plain Jane is an asset. Any logo's will just give away the age of the t-shirt and make it recognisable each time you wear it. You want a logo or slogan free white t-shirt so it camouflages with your outfit inorder to get maximum wear out of it. It's ideal to buy a tee that you can wash at home and at £45 if it gets worn out that's okay. Just be careful to lower the machine temperature to 30 degrees and only wash it with other white clothes. Iron the t-shirt inside-out to avoid any iron marks damaging the t-shirt. Avoid eating and drinking anything that could leave the t-shirt with a permanent stain.
Who knew a white sleeved t-shirt was such a commitment?
That's the thing with stuff worth having, it need's constant TLC, which brings me onto this...
I'm literally in love with this t-shirt and plotting to have fewer Starbucks Chai Tea's to justify the £215 price tag. If I had to describe my fashion sense as a country it would be Italy. A still rural part, where they use white cotton table clothes with a lace trimming in houses built of terracotta coloured walls. This t-shirt goes against so many of my earlier guidelines, it's far too fashionable to be a classic piece that doesn't stand out, it's sleeves are far too long and it ends far below the waistline but an exception can be made. It's not sexy and has an androgynous shape I want to drown myself in. It's borderline granny pants and I gotta have it!
Which brings me onto my final thought. The sheep on the hills graze on the grass all day long and need nothing else. There was a girl I spotted trying to feed a sheep and it just wobbled away with no f**** given. Can you imagine feeling content with what you already have? What a wonderful experience that must be.